TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
