So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
