This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
