Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.

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  (313): Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite. http://tfl.nu/pt3f
  Replies (3) Good night (1103) Bad night (2901)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  break up sex still means we will always be broken up.

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  (248): break up sex still means we will always be broken up. http://tfl.nu/dud5
  Replies (1) Good night (935) Bad night (1184)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn

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  (859): I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn http://tfl.nu/q2bp
  Replies (70) Good night (3364) Bad night (5202)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.

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  (610): Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays. http://tfl.nu/bu0x
  Replies (9) Good night (3649) Bad night (1243)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed

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  (604): his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed http://tfl.nu/zsvf
  Replies (20) Good night (1088) Bad night (4662)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.

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  (215): I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me. http://tfl.nu/0b6p
  Replies (6) Good night (3284) Bad night (1181)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.

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  (360): Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why. http://tfl.nu/20py
  Replies (8) Good night (5635) Bad night (849)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup

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  (248): after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup http://tfl.nu/a67v
  Replies (22) Good night (1172) Bad night (8912)
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  (310): View more from California

  we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.

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  (310): we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic. http://tfl.nu/v0qg
  Replies (9) Good night (1248) Bad night (3007)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties

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  (416): i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties http://tfl.nu/mxe3
  Replies (9) Good night (2845) Bad night (1020)
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  (510): View more from California

  God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.

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  (510): God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars. http://tfl.nu/alo4
  Replies (9) Good night (2927) Bad night (804)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.

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  (618): Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex. http://tfl.nu/rcfz
  Replies (13) Good night (1568) Bad night (788)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.

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  (416): BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me. http://tfl.nu/xkbl
  Replies (3) Good night (833) Bad night (357)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.

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  (636): Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that. http://tfl.nu/6860
  Replies (14) Good night (437) Bad night (1655)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?

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  (402): I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible? http://tfl.nu/xkkb
  Replies (5) Good night (544) Bad night (324)

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