Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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