i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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