We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
