Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
