Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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