watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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