i think my tv is drunk
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
