I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Enjoy the penises
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize