She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
