you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Randomize
