I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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