its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
