whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Your cock deserves a montage
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Randomize
