it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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