Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
