I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize
