Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
