i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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