My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
