bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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