Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
