well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize