I need help removing her.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
