You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Randomize
