He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
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