I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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