Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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