then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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