There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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