those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize