I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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