He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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