Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
porn star boner night. come get it.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
