I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
