i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
