This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize
