Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
