How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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