Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
