I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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