I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
