woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
my liver is dry heaving
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
