Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize