So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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