We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
ugly people sure do ruin things
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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