The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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