Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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